Tag: Ryan seacrest

Top 7 Cruising Songs (According to a One Year Old)

One of the big developments in the ol’ Daddy Realness household these last few months has been the ever improving vocabulary of little KJ. Between the indecipherable baby babble is the odd word or two that you can actually understand. And not only that, but he will use his words to communicate what he wants sometimes, too.

Take music, for example. Before, we would just play whatever, no questions asked. He’s probably heard more random sports talk radio and 1990s hip hop while riding with me than any one year old would care to admit (if they could even admit it).  Nowadays, though, he’ll demand to hear his favorite jams.

Like, loudly demand.

Like loudly, repeatedly demand, to the point that I have to stop listening to Nas’ Illmatic album, or Steve Philips talking about Jacob deGrom’s chances of winning the Cy Young Award, and put on what he wants.

So what does he like, you ask? Well, let me go Ryan Seacrest-mode on you, and count down the hits!

7. Johny Johny Yes Papa (Parents Version) by Cocomelon a.k.a. HA-HA-HA

 

Coming in at number seven is this song from Cocomelon. Basically, the parents keep getting up in the middle of the night to eat junk food, and then lie about it to each other, even after they’re caught. Eventually, their kids wake up and catch them, so they lie to them, too. They all keep laughing about the dishonesty for some reason. Deception is so hilarious? Anyway,  when KJ starts asking for “HA-HA-HA”, it’s time to press play on this song.

6. Roar By Katy Perry a.k.a Ra-Ra

 

Sliding in at number six is this anthem from Katy Perry. J loves this one, and I legit think that KJ only asks me to play it because it reminds him of his sister. I get that, unlike what’s next, at number five.

5. Baby??

Not gonna lie, KJ will frequently request to hear ‘Baby’, but I have no clue what the heck he wants. I end up random shuffling a Spotify playlist, stopping at songs with ‘baby’ in the title. ‘Baby’ by Justin Bieber, ‘Baby Got Back’ by Sir Mix-A-Lot, ‘Baby One More Time’ by Britney Spears etc. Not surprisingly, KJ will continually say no to everything, until he gives up, and asks for something else. Let’s just leave this one here, and keep on keepin’ on up the charts!

 

 

4. Basketball by Lil Bow Wow a.k.a. Ba-ball

Number four is this classic jam (no pun intended) from the artist formerly known as Lil Bow Wow.  Last week, KJ not only wanted to hear it on repeat all the way to daycare, but when I picked him up later, he wanted to hear it on repeat on the way home, too. But really, can you blame him? What one year old child doesn’t love early 2000s NBA references? Oh, nevermind. Let’s see what comes in at number three.

3. Baby Shark by Cocomelon a.k.a. Baby Do-do-do

 

Now this one is a certified banger!  Despite there being a way more viral version of this song, KJ likes this particular one, and this one only. It automatically came on after another Cocomelon video ended, and he was immediately hooked. Truth be told, I had no idea how big a phenomenom Baby Shark was until last week, when I saw Ellen talking about it, on the Ellen Show. Y’all have been doing the goofy shark dance for months now, but no one bothered to fill me in. Thanks, friends. Speaking of viral sensations………

 

In My Feelings By Drake aka Kiki!

Why in the world does a one year old like this Drizzy hit, you ask? I’m guessing it’s because he can say the first lyric (Kiki). Or maybe he just needs a black card and a code to the safe. Maybe he wants me to upload a video of him doing the In My Feelings Challenge. Regardless, this is the one joint here that I don’t mind listening to constantly (clean, radio edited version, of course).   Unlike the number one song on the list.

1. Wheels On the Bus By Cocomelon a.k.a. Bus! Bus!

 

When KJ starts screaming for ‘Bus! Bus!’ then you know it’s about to go down. Cocomelon must have some audio baby hypnosis going on, because he only likes their version of this timeless nursery rhyme, too.  The appeal here are the visuals. Besides a monkey’s naked butt, the video has easy to mimic actions, which KJ does in my car. He’ll give me a big, hokey thumbs up when it comes on, he’ll tell an invisible baby to shush, and so on. No doubt this one is a crowd-pleaser; especially if that crowd doesn’t include me. Nonetheless, its place at the top of the charts is firmly cemented on my drives with KJ.

Until the next countdown, Seacrest…out!

 

 

Top 10 Halloween Treats

Well,  another Halloween is in the books.

This year, B and J (dressed as Drake and a rocker girl, respectively) had a blast trick or treating, and came home with a pretty good haul of goodies. Mounds of junk food, for real.

One thing that I noticed was that some treats were better received than others. Uh, not just by B and J, but by me, too. As such, I figured I’d rank them. Consider this the top 10 Halloween treats that my kids got this year. There’s no real criteria; it’s just based on my own subjective, unintelligent, unreliable opinion.

Got it?

Ok, let’s get our Ryan Seacrest on, and count ’em down!

10. Granola Bars

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Coming in at number 10 is a good ol’ granola bar. While not as exciting as the other contenders, it does have its charms. For example, it’s probably not that unhealthy, so it can be used in candy negotiations (ie. “Daddy? Can I have a chocolate bar?” “No! No more junk. Go eat a granola bar or something.”). Plus, since nary an apple was found in any of the loot bags this year, it’ll have to do, as the only nutrional option.

9. Rockets

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Conversely, let’s talk about Rockets. These sweet tasting packages of sugar tablets have little in the way of nutritional value. However, they are a favorite among the kids, since they are sweet tasting packages of sugar tablets. The only reason that they aren’t higher on the list is because of J’s habit of playing with them and pretending they’re medicine.  The idea of a little girl and her stuffed animals play-popping pills is kind of weird, what can I say.

8. Smarties

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Don’t get it twisted, American readers. What we call Rockets up here in Canada, you guys call Smarties down there. Our Smarties are multi-coloured, candy-coated chocolates, however, and are, as the kids say, da bomb dot com. Oh Canada, indeed!

7. Tootsie Pops

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I have no idea if B and J even  like these. When I saw them in their bags, it made me think of that Lil Kim and Sisqo song “How Many Licks”, so that counts for something, right? Pretty sure that song wasn’t about Tootsie Pops, though.

6. Coffin Crisp

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Another Canadian specialty. This is a bite sized, Halloween-themed Coffee Crisp chocolate bar. Big ups for getting into the holiday spirit! In fact, the only thing better would be if the kids somehow got these full sized.

Wait, what’s that?

They did?

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Sweet! Hey, that was kind of fun. Let’s do that again!

5. Random Chocolate Bars

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These are cool…….

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But bigger is better!

Aight, one more time!

4. Caramilk Bar

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OK, now turn it up!

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Woooo!

Huh?

Check the back? Why?

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This expired in July? Who the heck gives out expired candy on Halloween?! That’s cold like Minnesota, yo.

Man, I need a new number 4.

New 4. Doritos

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Perfect. Cheesy, nachoey goodness. And most importantly, not expired.

3. Pringles

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Potato chips are always a hit, but the kids seemed to really like these mini Pringles cans, to get their salty fix.

2. Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups

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My personal favorite.  The only reasons that they aren’t number 1 is because when they are left in less than ideal temperatures, they melt, creating a gooey mess which the kids still eat, resulting in gooey messy children.

1. Cans of Soda

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Pop pop, homies! At the top of this chart are beverages! Maybe the people who handed these out did it deliberately. Or maybe they did it because they didn’t have any candy to give out, so they raided their pantry (sucks to be the kid who got a can of corn from them).  Regardless, B and J’s eyes lit up the most at these unusual handouts, so that’s why they are number 1. I remember feeling the same way when I got a can of Coke while trick or treating back in the day. It’s like ordering a pizza, and getting a steak instead. #whatapleasantsurprise

And that’s that. Peace out, starboys and stargirls.

I hope your Halloween was as spooktacular as ours!

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