Six Pieces of Advice For New Parents (That I Got From Some Wallpaper)

From time to time, I am asked by friends who are either expecting or already have little children, for parenting advice. And to be honest, I struggle for answers when  these questions come up. I think that I’m doing the best that I can, as a dad.  I definitely don’t think that makes me an advice-spewing expert on the subject, however.

I was pondering this the other day, while staring at the motivational sports quotes wallpaper that we have up in our house. The wallpaper is in a bathroom, so there’s lots of time to stare and ponder. #TMI. Anyway, to my surprise, a bunch of the quotes were pretty relevant, as they pertained to parenting.

Here are six of the ones which I feel are most useful for new/expecting parents. These tips are way more succinct than anything that I could ever come up with on my own:


I find that it’s easy to get caught up in focusing on the end results for my kids, without appreciating what it takes to get to those results. It’s not just that your baby learns to walk; it’s the moments you spend watching them try. It’s not just about them making the basketball team; it’s the fun you have with them goofing around, shooting hoops in the driveway. Stuff like that.


I don’t know about you, but my social media feeds are full of people proudly  posting about their childrens’ accomplishments.  For the longest while after B was born, my feed kind of gave me an  inferiority complex, no joke. My friends’ babies were hitting “milestones” before B was, and it had me straight trippin’ (OMG! Becky just posted a video of her one year old reading The Catcher In The Rye. B can’t even say The Catcher In The Rye! What’s wrong with him? What’s wrong with me?!). Looking back, I realize now that I was straight stupid. Stuff will happen when it happens, and things work out in the long haul, usually. There’s no point in worrying about it, and there’s definitely no point in comparing your kid’s development with your friends’ kids.

Along those lines:


Being a mom or dad is H.A.R.D. It’s unlike any other job in the world. There’s no quitting this job, though. And yeah, there are times where I feel like a lousy piece of parental garbage.  However, as bad as those lows feel, they have been hugely outnumbered by the highs of fatherhood. The feelings of those highs totally make the occasional low worth it. So nope,  I’ll never give up. Not on myself, and not on B and J.




Easier said than done, no doubt. I’m sure anyone who’s tried the “cry it out” method understands this well. Regardless, as much it sucks sometimes, you gotta do it, for your benefit and theirs.



No amount of planning can really prepare you for what is involved with being a mom or dad.  Nonetheless, having some sort of plan to deal with the various stuff that happens is a must. Hey, you might get lucky and your little boy or girl will fully potty-train themselves, for example. Chances are that probably won’t happen.

And finally, my favourite:



The other night, at dinner, I made a rookie mistake –

I gave B and J different forks.

J, displaying typical three year old girl logic, immediately tossed her fork across the table. She wanted the fork that B had so badly, she started crying. I’ve never seen someone so passionate about utensils before.  B, bless his heart, gave his fork up to her. Then, displaying typical six year old boy logic, he decided that he didn’t want J’s fork, either. He went and grabbed another one from the drawer. While he did this, J decided that her fork had germs on it, and needed to be washed. Not washed in the kitchen sink, however, but the bathroom sink.  She left, and didn’t come back for a long time. Maybe she was pondering the sports quotes wallpaper, I don’t know. Her mood had changed drastically, though, to happy, when she returned. So happy in fact, that she offered to give her freshly washed fork up to B. He politely declined.  J politely offered again. This was followed by another polite refusal from B. After some more polite arguing, J decided that she didn’t want the fork at all. She just wanted the fork that I gave her initially (the one she tossed). I handed it to her, and she used it to happily eat her dinner.

The point of this story?

I don’t really have one. I just thought it was funny.

That’s all for now. Hopefully this post has been of some assistance (for a change). Later!







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